#arthritis in horses knee

[horsentale]

Pain Relief

I love Horse N Tale horse pain relief products and pain management spray. Nothing else I’ve tried makes a dent in my back pain, but Horse N Tale ArthritisEz spray works well.  I ordered more to make sure I had some on a trip to a theme park.  I sprayed it on in the morning, rubbed it in and spent the day pain free!  That has never happened before!  My husband used the PainEz for the neuropathy in…

[talkethtothehandeth]

As much as I agree that people who have EDS shouldn’t talk over people who have worse disabilities than us, and as firmly as I believe that disabled people should let other disabled people speak about their struggles without comparing it to EDS, I need you to know that having EDS, especially my type— the one you find more often than other types, is not just “being bendy”.

I was diagnosed with EDS when I was a baby. I was very lucky, and was able to receive treatment (whether good or bad) quicker than others. However, EDS caused my hip dysplasia, it caused the condition that affected my mobility to the point where I needed three corrective hip surgeries; it was the cause of my bone not forming, I needed a bone donor to aid in correction. I have three long scars on my bikini line where Dr Caroll (from Shriner’s in Utah) cut into me in order to give me a better chance of having less limited mobility.

EDS isn’t just me being able to play bendy straw with my hands, it isn’t just me having to deal with “fake dislocations, it’s subluxations so it’s not that bad”. It caused my scoliosis, it caused my arthritis from my joints going out of place so often. I was diagnosed with osteoarthritis as a child, but as I got older, my arthritis spread to more places. I have burning nerve pain that makes me want to die, I have partial paralysis whenever my body decides to attack me spontaneously, I have dystonia, I have hearing loss, allergic reactions, and pain in every joint in my entire body. From head to toe, all of my joints, all of my muscles.

EDS is something that has severely impacted and negatively effected my entire body. It took everything from me, it took my already limited mobility, it took my peace, it took my mental health, it took my most beloved hobby ever— riding horses. I cannot sit to play piano, use my hands for my guitar, sit in a chair for more than 30 minutes without my back muscles screaming.

I took 14 pills every single day with multiple prescriptions because of what EDS has caused. I am undiagnosed with something that nearly killed me last year, everyone was preparing for me to die, and it has been dismissed by anxiety or an eating disorder, it is caused by my disease. EDS will affect me for the rest of my life.

EDS isn’t “just” being hyper mobile. This isn’t just a small disease that people go through, it is life altering and life compromising and life threatening from all of the comorbidities that come along with it; it is debilitating, it is isolating, it is pain that cannot be treated with even IV morphine, it is a constant, unrelenting acid rain condition just as many other physical disabilities.

People who have EDS shouldn’t try to play the Sick Olympics, we shouldn’t go to someone’s page and say “I’M JUST AS SICK AND DISABLED AS YOU ARE”. We should take the time to listen to people who have it worse, because so often they get ignored by abled people, they don’t need other disabled people to say that their conditions aren’t worse just because we have it bad. So many people are definitely more disabled than I am, and that absolutely does not erase my struggles.

Every physical disability affects the body in different ways, and every physical disability isn’t necessarily comparable to others. My degenerative arthritis isn’t the same as someone’s ankylosing spondylitis. My joints are fucked and my mobility has been significantly decreased as my disease has progressed. I am not going to compare my knees that will need to be replaced to someone whose spine is literally fusing together. Even though it’s a form of arthritis, it isn’t the same as mine and it isn’t my place to pretend it is.

But someone saying “it’s just hyper mobility” is perpetuating a harmful narrative, because people already don’t believe us, our stuff doesn’t show in labs and it only shows during further and extensive testing that many doctors don’t want to pursue because we’re “faking” or “being over dramatic”, because it isn’t “that bad”, it’s just bendy joints, it’s not debilitating./s It isn’t just being bendy, it is so much more and doesn’t need to be dismissed solely because it isn’t the same or as severe as someone else’s condition. Even if someone does have it worse, it doesn’t mean that EDS isn’t bad, and just because someone has EDS, it doesn’t mean it’s always comparable and needs to be shouted to the world on people’s posts about a completely different situation.

[cuckoo-on-a-string]

Promises Five: The Hunt

Dark!Morpheus x (female)reader, fantasy/medieval AU, 18+

Master List

Dream of the Endless had been promised a bride.

A/N: I'll offer song recs to folks who are interested in asks! Still dealing with some mental health issues, but pushing through. HOLY SHIT THE NEXT CHAPTER. 0,0 Liking is sweet, commenting is divine. Talk to the lonely hermit, people. Her dog is tired of her shit.

The hounds sang after the hinds, and their masters followed them under the trees.

In the distance, the high castle sat like a toy house from which all the dolls had escaped, spreading their games and pageantry through the forest with bells and horns to warn away the deer and fox. Huntsmen released other deer, fox, and fowl from prearranged cages out of sight of the king and his swarm of courtiers, so the dolls could play pretend at feats of skill.

The bard kept to the back, holding a tight rein on her grey mare – who didn’t understand why she couldn’t stop and graze if the bard insisted on moving so slowly – in the company of the ladies Alder. Eilwyn, who’d visited the bard’s chamber two nights past, glimmered and glowed, illuminated like a piece of art in the dappled sunlight and the eyes of a few dozen would-be suitors. Officially, no one could pay court until the Endless had his pick. Unofficially, Eilwyn had received six declarations of love, five bad poems about her eyes, one good poem about her hair, and an uninspired puzzle box containing a gaudy necklace without a single gem of value.

Eilwyn loved it all, of course.

But as the younger woman amused herself snaring hearts for her collection, the bard conversed with the Dowager Alder, Eilwyn’s grandmother.

“The city lights are unbearable,” the elder Alder insisted. “My eyes are bad enough as it is, but when every street and tavern glows like the moon, I can hardly make out the planets with my telescope, let alone the fainter stars. With the travel time, I’ll lose whole weeks of work, and gods know if I’ll be alive to note my calculations this time next year.”

Manly shouts and howling dogs suggested something ahead had died, or was about to. The bard wondered how many of these fools in their fine furs would discover the material cost of bloodsport when they couldn’t scrub the stains from their velvets in the morning.

“You say that every year.”

The Elder Alder, on her aged palfrey, squinted at the green canopy shielding her beloved sky and tutted.

“And one year I’ll be right, like I always am in the end.”

The woman was an astronomer, a mathematical magician, and the idea of death hadn’t scared her since the bard first met her as a young maid. The wheel of the heavens moved before her, and it would move after, and that was well enough if she could just understand the damn thing before she shuffled off this mortal coil. She’d written books, and papers, and more books, and the bard wondered if Death would really hold off until the universe held no more mysteries. It wouldn’t be the first time.

“Of course, Lady Alder.”

Arthritis had long-since gnarled the lady’s hands, and they twisted over the saddle pommel and a hank of her horse’s main like knobby cypress knees, straining with the roll and sway of her palfrey’s gait.

“How far is the damned camp?”

Another lady – one of the fools hoping to wed her daughter to the Endless riding very far ahead near the king – seized the reins of her precious child’s horse and passed the odd trio. She did not look to the side. She did not look at anything. She lifted her nose far too high. And she nearly trotted over her own servants in passing.

The bard waved, and the daughter gawked with wide eyes as she was spirited away from poor influences and dangerous words. Really, any damage was already done, and fleeing the scene of battle only showed weakness. What kind of lesson would the girl really learn besides the fact that her mother enjoyed making a spectacle of her piety? Parents really had the strangest ideas about children.

“Grandmother!” Eilwyn exclaimed, clearly delighted.

The bard, equally delighted, couldn’t help herself. “Such language from so fair a lady. Shocking.”

The Dowager shifted in her saddle, face puckered in discomfort. “Hush, the both of you.”

Oh, if only she could. She laughed to imagine how much pain and trouble might’ve been saved. And how many adventures missed. They never would’ve been friends at all if the bard kept her own counsel.

“You expect a bard to hold her tongue?”

“The sun will freeze first.” The Dowager made a point of staring down her granddaughter, though, and her granddaughter made a point of smiling very prettily in reply. A lord several lengths ahead called for Lady Eilwyn’s attention, and she brokered an armistice by riding out of her grandmother’s line of sight entirely, leaving the two old companions to fight their own wars.

“My old bones are not made for riding.”

A jolt of pity seared the bard’s belly like the pain after eating a rotten fish. She’d rather purge it and be done, but the prickling discomfort would only grow with age. There was no course but to swallow it down and imagine it hurt much less than it would in time.

“Why didn’t you take the coach then? It could’ve brought you in comfort.”

Swollen knuckles flexing, the lady scoffed. “With the rest of the invalids? Don’t insult me.”

“But it’s so much fun, old friend.”

“Old,” Lady Alder muttered. “Yes. I am that.”

The bard shifted in her own saddle, wondering if she could stomach any of the inevitable banquet awaiting them.

“That wasn’t the word I’d hoped you’d echo.”

An eye sharper than any hawk’s pinned her from the side, and she felt like a child caught sulking. “If you need reassurance as to that, then you are not half so clever as you make yourself out to be.”

She seized on the opportunity for levity and smiled with all her teeth. “You’ve known me for a fool many years, have you not?”

“Aye, but a clever one.” The lady considered. “Most days.”

“Such praise you give me.”

“You fished for it so often the lake is empty.”

“Unfair but not untrue.”

The lady hummed her affirmation, welcoming in a moment of calm as they road in the wake of the hunt’s chaos.

Ahead, those most eager to prove themselves brought down smaller prey on their way to the day’s camp. Once all had a chance to refresh themselves with wine as their horses grazed, most would sally out again in the name of dead beasts. Dusk would bring them back, and they’d spend the night drinking, feasting, and debauching one another just outside the safe ring of torchlight, pretending to be very daring and wild for fucking someone in a bush.  A bit more hunting in the morning for those who could still sit straight in the saddle, and then all would return bloody and victorious to the castle.

The bard struggled to understand those who found the prospect of a royal hunt… thrilling. None worried to go home hungry, and the creatures they met in the wood came hobbled, with teeth filed and tusks blunted.

Rushing down a winding stair risked greater peril.

Bored by the day’s excitement, she let her thoughts spin out in wider and wider passes, circling the crux of the drama.

What did the King of Dreams dream of?

Revenge, she suspected. Vengeance on the king that may boil over on the land he ruled, and she must guide her favorites out of the flood’s path. Those practical answers satisfied the part of her that always craved a direction, a purpose, the next challenge to conquer, but the Dream King’s retribution sat like a wax seal over a longer letter. She would very much like to read that letter, even if it was dangerous, and unwise, and entirely reckless.

The Prince of Stories must have depths unfathomable, millennia upon eon of secrets and experiences carved into his bones. She wanted to dismiss her curiosity as nothing but interest in a vision of her future. Would she be like him in another thousand years? No. She’d still be human, and he was Endless. All the lifetimes of the Earth couldn’t teach her to understand one such as him.

But that didn’t mean she had no desire to try.

From farther up the line, a runner came jogging, peering up at the faces of the mounted company. He looked from one to another, seeking the right address to receive his message. The bard paused, recognizing the Everard house colors on servant’s tabard. Her horse stamped, whickering around the bit as her rider leaned out of the saddle to catch the young man’s eye. He saw her and darted to her side quick as an arrow.

“Is all well?” the bard asked.

“My lady Alis Everard and my lord Tomas Everard request you ride with them.”

The bard looked to Lady Alder. She hardly needed her friend’s permission, and none of the Alders were the sort to cherish grudges over perceived slights. But the bard didn’t want to leave her to ride alone, either. She needed good conversation and someone who cared enough to notice if she swayed on her horse.

“Oh, go tend to your nervous foal.” Lady Alder waved her off. “My own proud filly will see you pass and return to keep me amused. We favor different arts, but she has a sharp enough eye to see trouble riding by.”

“Thank you.” The bard pulled out of the column of riders, careful to avoid the servant at her side. “I’ll see you at the camp.”

Whatever Lady Alder replied was lost to the wind. Finally given her head, the bard’s mare leapt into a canter, her hooves thumping a second heartbeat that rattled up and through her rider. Old loam and the sharp green scent of freshly broken twigs gathered around her like a cloak as she moved just left of the path, removed from the rock and dust of the road.

The bard knew what colors to look for, and she let all definition blur as she moved past lords, ladies, knights, and their scores of attendants. They all looked so strange and out of place in the tunnel of green woods, dressed to stand out in a part of the world where blending in more often preserved life.

Near the front of the cavalcade, she found the Everards. Alis stared with wide eyes as the bard pulled even with her, mare prancing and snorting in frustration as her run came to an end. Her dramatic entrance pulled other eyes, and the king – only a few riders ahead – glanced back with frustrated disgust. Perhaps she should apologize that she wasn’t a stag. For all of the ruckus she’d heard from afar, she saw precious few carcasses dangling from the hunters’ belts.

“Thank you for coming in such haste,” Lord Everard said. Stifled amusement plucked at his lips, trying to lift them into a broad, laughing gale. It would be bad manners to laugh too loudly too near the king over a jest to which he wasn’t party, but Everard clearly struggled.

She answered with the grin he’d tried to school away. “Best way to travel. Now, what is the matter?”

Lord Everard gestured to his daughter, and she in turn tried to sink into the mud of the forest track. She hunched low, like she could melt into her boots. Her complexion had gone pale, despite the flush of embarrassment creeping up her neck, and her gloves creaked as her dainty hands squeezed into fists. The bard let the merriment fade, looking and listening beyond the girl’s silence.

Alis’s doe eyes flicked towards the shadow who rode beside her king, and the bard understood.

Dream of the Endless wore his customary black, with the blood-red ruby shining on his breast like a heart he’d ripped from his prey. His nightmare mount had teeth where it ought to have eyes, and it laughed with a man’s voice. He carried a raven on his shoulder rather than a hawk on his glove, and anyone who hadn’t met his sister may mistake him for an aspect of Death. Or something worse, perhaps.

Lord of Nightmares indeed.

“He frightens me,” Alis whispered, leaning close. “I’ve had nothing but bad dreams since I came to the castle.”

As she should. A glance at her father confirmed he thought the same. Just because he’d been forced to bring his child to this storm didn’t mean he didn’t fear the lightning. He had too much sense for this farce and too big a heart to let the girl suffer. If his wife were not busy running the estate, she’d be here to shelter and comfort their little girl, but in her absence, he must ask the bard to fill the role, and she gladly pulled Alis’s attention from bad dreams to simpler truths.

“And you’ve never had a nightmare before?” She didn’t chide. She reminded. Even in the security of her own bed in her own home, the girl had touched the darker shores of the Dreaming. Its king would not reach out to swallow her now, even though he prowled so near in the Waking. “Alis, believe me, you are safe.”

Alis pulled her spine straight, taking a deep, intentional breath that shuddered on the way in and trembled on the way out.

“Do you promise?”

“I promise that if I’m wrong, I’ll find a convenient sword to fall on, and you can say you told me so. Does that make you feel better?”

“A little.” Realizing what she’d said, Alis blanched and rushed to add, “But only because I know you’d come back!”

This time her father did laugh, and the bard reached to reassure her with an honest to gods giggle, when chaos erupted at the front. The king and his companions came to a dead stop, and without warning or order, those who rode behind struggled to halt in time. Rearing horses and shouts of alarm rolled down the line like a breaker, and in the wave of confusion that followed, the bard once again left the road to circle forward.

They’d reached the camp.

A glory of golden stitching over swaths of emerald, the vast tents might cover an entire town, and smoke rising with the smells of rosemary and stewed venison hinted at the delights within.

The display paled behind the entity waiting at the edge of the woods, however.

Golden eyes like licks of flame from the sun’s heart smiled over ruby lips. Welcoming and menacing and all-too pleased with themselves.

Power perfumed the air, like honeysuckle and ambergris, clashing with the winter-cold snap of Dream’s clear displeasure. The King of Dreams had lost the veneer of humanity, and he set himself against the intruder like the deepest hour of the night resisting the dawn.

Few creatures could stand up to the king’s guest. Even fewer commanded the presence of function beyond personification. The bard did not know who the stranger was, but she knew what they were.

Another fucking Endless.

Every inch screamed of passion, romance, obsession. Golden hair and loose-fit silks that flowed like water into a garment that was neither tunic nor gown inspired sensual curiosities. They rode a unicorn, a bay mount with cloven hooves, a lion’s tail, and a goat’s beard. The russet horn glinted with flecks of gold, like treasure winking through a smear of blood.

The King of Dreams sneered, lip curling as he shared a frigid greeting.

“Sibling.”

The Endless in their path laughed, bright as bells and smooth brandy. It sounded to the bard’s ears like trouble. “I hope you don’t mind if I join in your hunt. Big brother.”

[basshole-astard]

hey you, blogger. do you find yourself in incredible pain daily? even weekly? despite being in your 30s, or younger? despite doing everything that's ""supposed"" to help?

On top of being in incredible pain, can you or could you at any point in your life:

bend yourself into funny positions like putting your foot behind your head

can bend down without fanfare and put your palms COMPLETELY FLAT on the floor

do your elbows bend a bit backwards? how about your knees?

you can bend your pinkies backwards 90 degrees

you find your joints are incredibly weak and garbage; wrists often in pain despite doing stretches; shoulders/neck always hurting no matter how good your posture is; can’t get down on your hands and knees because doing so is Ow Ow Oof Ouch

you have gastrointestinal issues that you cannot link to food in any way (yes, for real,)

headaches/migraines – especially unexplained, but even if you do have an explanation (for real)

never had enough room in your mouth for your teeth

vision prescription gets better and then gets worse again and you find yourself very confused about how??? why????

have really bad allergies including “I can’t use x soap it gives me a rash for some reason” or other similar “coming into contact with certain things makes me break out” (it’s called MCAS, it’s often comorbid)

stand up and your heartrate spikes and/or you get dizzy (that’s called POTS, also comorbid)

Then, hi, you might possibly have something called Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, or EDS; specifically the hypermobile subtype (hEDS), which doesn’t yet have a known genetic marker and goes wildly underdiagnosed in patients, partly because the things they test for hypermobility are pretty limited, partly because doctors don’t know what it is, partly because doctors would rather diagnose you with a different condition (if arthritis or fibromyalgia diagnoses/treatment didn’t help, well...!) because if it sounds like a horse it’s PROBABLY a horse (but it could be a zebra)

Of course having any one of these does not an hEDS diagnosis make, but if you have multiple on my above list? Multiple of the list I am including below the cut? It’s worth looking into. You can continue on reading to see my brief overview, or you can head to www.ehlers-danlos.com to do your own research; they’re a great resource!

"I have a lot of these but not all of them" that's still worth looking into! I've only got five on the above list, and i definitely still have hEDS! Even three is worth considering!

more symptoms and info below the cut, if you want to hear it from a fellow blogger who was diagnosed at 25 and found the diagnosis Extremely Eye Opening as to why i was always in pain and Various Other Issues

---

General hEDS info: EDS itself is a genetic disorder that affects your connective tissue, which in general makes your joints weak and your ligaments weaker. hEDS is the most common subtype, in which you have a lot of EDS traits AND hypermobility BUT none of the genetic markers for the 12 other EDS subtypes.

“Wait, but this thing I can do is normal, my whole family can do it!” or “my mother’s side of the family is all like this!” hEDS is genetic. It’s possible to have it if your parents don’t, but VERY unlikely. So unlikely, in fact, that having immediate family history of hEDS is one of the 3 main diagnostic criteria for it. (You can still get diagnosed if you hit the other 2, but they only ask for 2/3.)

“Surely it can’t be so hard to diagnose that doctors don’t notice it!” my sister did not find out until she was in her 30s, because one of her friends has hEDS, and when my sister was bemoaning how useless doctors were, her friend was like “....hey those sound like MY symptoms, have you considered you might have hEDS?” (Which, due to it being genetic, is how my mom and I found out we also probably had it.) Also, much like ADHD, doctors are wary of diagnosing people with it, afraid they’re just trying to get the “good” meds.

“What good does a diagnosis/research even do me?” 1) an explanation for why you’re in pain all the time 2) knowledge so you can avoid doing things that would hurt you (you have to be SOOO careful with most forms of exercise!) 3) it’s a disorder that warrants higher pain meds than what you can get OTC, so if you are seriously in a lot of pain all the time, and would like to not be...

I’m gonna put a more in-depth list of symptoms below. If you have any five of them, I highly suggest you poke around www.ehlers-danlos.com and do your own research, because even if you aren’t in a position to get a clinical diagnosis right now, even suspecting you MIGHT Have it is useful, either for an explanation for all the things that seem wrong with your body that couldn’t otherwise be explained, or to know that... hey, you should really be careful with what kinds of physical exercise you’re doing, because your risk of injury for some sports is WAY higher than it is for people who don’t have hEDS. More on that below, as well.

-

Symptoms list time:

*THIS IS ALMOST DEFINITELY A MARKER OF hEDS*

hypermobile joints

unstable/weak joints

joints that dislocate frequently

CHRONIC PAIN

stretchy and fragile skin (classic EDS marker, but can show up in hEDS): do you bruise easily? Do cuts take forever to heal?

your parent(s) are also like this (it's a genetic disorder!! Chances are you got it from one of them!!! Love to hear “oh my hips do that too!!! Didn’t realize it wasn’t normal” thanks mom.)

"my parents don't have hEDS tho" are you sure. like. my mom didn't know until my sister found out she did. this thing is *wildly underdiagnosed*. Mom’s in her 50s and had doctors diagnose her with arthritis and fibromyalgia, the treatments for which didn’t help her because it wasn’t what was actually wrong

-

*OTHER THINGS THAT OFTEN COME FREE WITH YOUR hEDS*

chronic fatigue

gastrointestinal issues (if you thought you had IBS, but hit any of the hEDS things, you should consider, well, an hEDS diagnosis; gastroparesis is a common comorbidity)

dysautonomia; i don't have this but it causes things like POTS or "heartrate spikes when i stand" or "i get dizzy when i stand and lose vision briefly"

headaches (and/or migraines!)

MCAS, aka really bad allergies. your nose gets offended at the slightest bit of pollen. the weirdest materials give you a rash. you can only use one soap because all the other ones make you break out. etc.

...ADHD. I’m not shitting you. It is so frequently comorbid that in the UK when you test positive for either ADHD or hEDS they will immediately test you for the other. Connective tissue exists in your brain, as well, so I guess if your connective tissue just doesn’t function properly...

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HEY CAN YOU PUT THIS IN NON-CLINICAL TERMS FOR ME

sure! did you, at any point in your life:

- able to bend into funny positions like put foot behind head; especially as a kid (hi! that's me!) but of particular note if you can still do those things now

- stretches like butterfly or crossing your arm over your chest just... don’t feel like stretches? (my sister)

- could you bend and without effort place your palms flat on the floor? can you still now? apparently most people struggle - without regular stretching - to touch their toes, let alone put their palms *completely flat* to the floor. that's hypermobility baby!

- elbows bend a little bit backwards? knees?

- can you bend your pinkies back 90 degrees?

- consider yourself double-jointed?

- shoulders/neck always hurt? and like your muscles are SOOOO tight in your neck all the time? hey guess what: the thing EDS does is make your body produce less collagen, which makes your ligaments weak as fuck, and so your muscles are constantly spasming to hold your head up. this is why you're in pain. this is why working the knots out never helps and they always come back. no, this isn't because you’re on your computer too much. your body was just built differently (poorly)

- stretching never seems to help? stretches make you hurt more??? or even: most forms of exercise cause you pain? yeah, most exercise/stretches are meant for Able Bodied People, not people with an underlying undiagnosed hypermobility disorder. You have to adapt them to your needs, and also stretches will never be the be-all-end-all solution to back pain like those funny little infographics on the internet will try and tell you. Maybe it is for able-bodied people, if you have a genetic condition that causes chronic pain, well,

- “but my shoulders are soooo tight tho” POINTING ABOVE AGAIN. they are doing that because the muscles have to overcompensate for your weak ligaments. Stretching does not fix this; you may loosen your muscles, but they will simply tighten again later. The real fix is doing exercises to improve your shoulder muscle stability – I’ll talk about some exercises below.

- have you ever thought to yourself "what the hell, i'm too young to be in this much pain all the time??" you're right! it might be hEDS.

- struggle with opening jars? weak upper body strength? randomly lose your grip on things you’re holding with your hands? “are you serious” I’m serious

- can't crawl on your hands and knees because that hurts your wrists and your knees?

- tangentially: did your parents say you crawled funny as a kid? army crawl? started walking way earlier than expected? yeah.

- you can't squat or kneel because ow oof ow your ankles ow ow your knees? yeah.

- is getting up from the floor hard sometimes?? despite being 30 or younger???? yeah.

- despite everything, and not trying to be, you're still kind of really flexible???

- like, you could do the splits as a kid without having to train yourself to do it?? you can still do the splits now without any effort at all?

- do you seem to get injured really easily? joints especially, or, again, bruised really easily.

- are you in pain right now? think about it. shoulders? back? legs? did you see the part where one of the diagnostic criteria for hEDS is chronic pain? yeah.

i could probably keep going.

-

~here's some specific connective tissue disorder things; i've included only the extremely "normal" ones that haven’t already been listed above and/or are easy to check yourself. you can find a full list at https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/what-is-eds/hypermobile-ehlers-danlos-syndrome-heds/ under "how is hEDS diagnosed?"~

listed above: stretchy/fragile skin. By stretchy btw I mean: can you pinch your skin anywhere and pull and get even half an inch away from your body? Neck/back of hand is a good place to try. If you can’t pinch your skin at all w/o hitting Meat then you don’t have this (I don’t, even tho my sister does!) but it’s worth looking out for and alone is like THE thing EDS (all types) is characterized by, so if your skin stretches, that’s of particular notice (but your skin not stretching does not disqualify you from having EDS)

stretch marks (they hate to use this if you're afab, but,)

"Bilateral piezogenic papules of the heel" uh when you're standing are your heels kinda. lumpy. like they got balls in 'em. that's what this is. (this is one of the things i have)

dental crowding (lol!!!!)

can you close your thumb+pinky around both your wrists? (steinberg sign)

when you make fists, thumbs underneath fingers, do your thumbs stick out past your fingers? (walker sign)

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“Hey, I’m not really hypermobile - is it still possible to have hEDS??”

in theory! I’m only mildly hypermobile myself, outside of the “foot behind head” trick from when i was ten and the “can even now at 25 bend down and put palms flat on floor with no effort” i have… basically no other signs of hypermobility. Though, I guess “things that should be stretches like butterfly or touching your toes are super easy and not stretches for me” also counts as being hypermobile, huh. It’s just really mild.

And, you know, maybe you just have a different EDS subtype. EDS as a whole is not super well understood, so the chances you got a doctor who didn’t know what it was / didn’t want to order a genetic test about it is still, like, high enough it’s worth looking into, I think.

Basically every issue my body has can be drawn back to hEDS, and that kind of knowledge is insane but also really liberating. There is a cause for this. I’m not just in pain for no reason – or worse – because I’m “bad” at taking care of myself. I have a genetic disorder that makes it so my joints don’t work right and also I’m in pain all the time. It’s not necessarily happy, but at least it’s an explanation, instead of sitting there and shrugging and going “I dunno” about it.

So, sincerely, if even five of the things I’ve listed above sound familiar to you, I think you should look into it. Maybe you’ll research and go “oh, that doesn’t sound like me at all, actually”, but on the chance you, like me, start researching and find yourself going “THAT’S WHAT’S BEEN CAUSING THAT THIS WHOLE TIME????” I think it’s worth looking into. That validation is sincerely quite freeing.

-

“Ok, you've convinced me. Now what do I do?”

first of all research some more!

https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/what-is-eds/ <-- EDS overview and EDS subtypes! Maybe you have one that isn’t hEDS

https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/what-is-eds/hypermobile-ehlers-danlos-syndrome-heds/ <-- hEDS specific page

https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/heds-diagnostic-checklist/ <-- hEDS diagnostic checklist

https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/assessing-joint-hypermobility/#1667831445611-fb40d58e-84a4 <-- the checklist opens on something called the Beighton scale, which is explained in more detail here. **IF YOU DO NOT SCORE HIGH ON THE BEIGHTON SCALE BUT STILL HAVE MOST OTHER HEDS ISSUES, PRESS FOR DIAGNOSIS NONETHELESS. ENTIRELY POSSIBLY YOU ARE HYPERMOBILE IN AREAS THAT AREN’T TRACKED BY THE BEIGHTON SCALE. IT’S IMPERFECT AND PROBABLY NEEDS TO BE REPLACED BUT THEY HAVEN’T GOTTEN AROUND TO IT YET.**

https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/2017-eds-classification-non-experts/ <-- EDS things in layman’s terms, including comorbidities, like what I was talking about wrt gastrointestinal issues, orthopedic issues, chronic fatigue issues, etc, etc, etc. if you have issues with allergies look at the Mast Cell Disorder one. if you have that “heartrate spikes or I get dizzy when I stand” issue look at the Cardiovascular Autonomic Dysfunction one.

(ngl, sorry if its gross, but learning that hEDS often comes packaged with gastrointestinal issues was what really sealed the whole deal for me being convinced, despite “your sister has it and your mom almost definitely has it” being EXTREMELY damning evidence, because. I have had issues with diarrhea my whole goddamn life. I can’t tie it to food. It just curses me daily.)

second of all: talk to your doctor! or, find a doctor in your area that specializes in EDS. book an appointment, see what they can offer you. they can probably hook you up with physical therapy options (to safely strengthen your muscles to compensate for your weak connective tissue) or some pain management options! If you find the physical therapist is making you do things that make you hurt more and they repeatedly do not listen to you and your body, fire them and find a new physical therapist. 

https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/healthcare-professionals-directory/ <-- list of doctors. 

Third of all: find a support group if you’d like? There’s FB groups and Reddit groups and probably even more. Links to some of them here: https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/support/ 

YMMV because hEDS sometimes gets shit on by people with the other EDS subtypes, but at the very least, if a fellow Zebra is bitching about a doctor, you’ll know who to avoid. 

Fourth: Just… if you think you might have it, I want you to take a step back and reconsider the way you feel about yourself and maybe about the exercise you are/aren’t doing. I had a lot of compounded guilt about how I “wasn’t taking good enough care of myself” ; when you’re in pain all the time you sometimes start blaming yourself, especially if you, like me, find that exercise is difficult and painful and that stretching doesn’t ACTUALLY help, you quit doing it. But you don’t always quit thinking “well apparently if I did those stretches to prevent back pain that people always talk about, then I wouldn’t have any back pain!!!!!!” and that kind of mindset... sucks.

It's also not true. Like, not in general, but also especially not if you have hEDS. My back is in pain because my body was built different (poorly), NOT because I “wasn’t doing the right thing”.

So here’s my get out of jail free card, for you. You aren’t in pain because you aren’t doing anything to “fix” it. You’re just in pain. Sure, you can do some (specialized) (hEDS friendly ones) exercises to help combat it, or you could go take some painkillers, but... your pain is not a punishment for your decision not to exercise. Your pain just kinda... is.

Every generalized exercise advice you see online you need to take with a grain of salt anyway, because it was not written for people with a hypermobility disorder. If doing it doesn’t help, then you don’t need to push through the pain because “it’s the thing that’s supposed to fix everything!!!!” No no. There is no correct answer. There is no one-size fits all. If it doesn’t help, or if it hurts, then you shouldn’t do it.

I say this from a place of love. I spent several months trying to fix my wrist pain with stretches, and you know what never went away? My wrist pain. In fact, I’m mildly convinced the stretches made the pain worse. I kept pushing through it for ages, though, because I kept getting told it was supposed to help, and that it was IMPORTANT as someone who spends all day on the computer to TAKE CARE OF MY WRISTS via THESE STRETCHES WE HAVE HELPFULLY COMPILED ONTO AN INFOGRAPHIC FOR YOU!!!!! ...but that’s not how it works. The rules are a little different when you have a hypermobility disorder. You have to really look into exercises that are safe for you to do, instead of just assuming the ones that everyone passes around are going to help.

“Man, so even those shoulder stretches you see around might not help?” nope! They might not!

“What do I do then?” strengthening exercises... I’ll put resources / explain one easy one (for shoulders) below.

Also if you are someone with a job that requires sitting at the computer all day, and you’re worried about how that affects your health... Even if you just get up once every two hours and walk around / look at something else (even your bathroom!!!) for a little bit, that’s fine, that’s plenty, that’s more than enough. You don’t have to stretch your shoulders every 30 minutes. You shouldn’t stretch your shoulders every 30 minutes if that’s hurting you.

RESOURCES TIME

1) https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/resource/strengthen-your-hypermobile-core-a-home-exercise-approach-for-eds-hsd-and-hypermobility-jeannie-di-bon/ <-- webinar that covers at-home exercises you can do

2) and a whole playlist of at-home exercises (in reasonable sized video chunks) by one of the experts, here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLp-oNOmoFdAMFZB7XfpUZyvg_xzE3S3Ue – DISCLAIMER I HAVE NOT WATCHED OR USED THESE, SO WHILE I CAN SAY I DOUBT SHE WOULD BE FEATURED WERE SHE NOT A REAL EXPERT, PLEASE JUST. Err on the side of caution. If even one of these hurts you, try not to do it until you can talk with your personal physical therapist, which, yes, I realize requires Acquiring one first..... worth poking around tho, this person has a ton of tips on how to be careful with your joints while doing chores and day-to-day tasks as well, it seems. Actual advice that might actually help you instead of “oh make sure to stretch every 30 minutes!!!!” (might not help) or “have you tried jogging? Its free and easy!!!!!” (sport that is more likely to injure you thanks to the weak joints thing)

3) You can also search “exercise” on ehlers-danlos.com and come up with a ton of other pages/videos/etc of EDS friendly exercises produced by the experts that run this site.

4) That One Easy One I Can Explain In A tumblr Post: Bridging

Meant for core stability, but also works towards strengthening your shoulder muscles as well. Bridges!!! You can probably look up guides, or the lady I linked above has a video that includes her doing bridges about 4 minutes in. here's the video (link).

The version I do involves going up for five seconds, then down for five seconds, repeating for a minute (time yourself). Each day add on ten seconds (so second day you do a minute ten, third day minute twenty, etc) until you are eventually able to do it for three minutes. You do not need to go past three minutes. You are recommended not to. You are recommended to work up to 3 minutes and then continue doing it for 3 minutes every day.

(It doesn’t have to be every day nor does it necessarily have to be 3 minutes every time; if I’m tired or in a hurry I’ll just do two minutes. If I’m really tired I’ll just skip it and do it the next day. No big deal!)

That’s all I got. Thanks for listening to me rant. Hope it was enlightening at all!

[floridaboiler]

What Is The Main Ingredient of WD-40?

Before you read to the end, does anybody know what the main ingredient of WD-40?

No Cheating.....

WD-40 ~ Who knew!

I had a neighbour who bought a new pickup.

I got up very early one Sunday morning and saw that someone had spray

painted red all around the sides of this beige truck (for some unknown

reason).

I went over, woke him up, and told him the bad news.

He was very upset and was trying to figure out what to do ....

probably nothing until Monday morning, since nothing was open.

Another neighbour came out and told him to get his WD-40 and clean it off.

It removed the unwanted paint beautifully and did not harm his paint

job that was on the truck. I was impressed!

WD-40 who knew?

"Water Displacement #40".

The product began from a search for a rust preventative solvent and

degreaser to protect missile parts.

WD-40 was created in 1953, by three technicians at the San Diego

Rocket Chemical Company.

Its name comes from the project that was to find a 'Water

Displacement' Compound.

They were finally successful for a formulation, with their fortieth

attempt, thus WD-40. The 'Convair Company' bought it in bulk to

protect their atlas missile parts.

Ken East (one of the original founders) says there is nothing in WD-40

that would hurt you.

When you read the 'shower door' part, try it. It's the first thing

that has ever cleaned that spotty shower door. If yours is plastic,

it works just as well as on glass. It's a miracle!

Then try it on your stove-top.

It's now shinier than it's ever been.

You'll be amazed.

WD-40 Uses:

1. Protects silver from tarnishing.

2. Removes road tar and grime from cars.

3. Cleans and lubricates guitar strings.

4. Gives floor that 'just-waxed' sheen without making them slippery.

5. Keeps the flies off of Cows, Horses, and other Farm Critters.

6. Restores and cleans chalkboards.

7. Removes lipstick stains.

8. Loosens stubborn zippers.

9. Untangles jewellery chains.

10. Removes stains from stainless steel sinks.

11. Removes dirt and grime from the barbecue grill.

12. Keeps ceramic/terracotta garden pots from oxidising.

13. Removes tomato stains from clothing.

14. Keeps glass shower doors free of water spots.

15. Camouflages scratches in ceramic and marble floors.

16. Keeps scissors working smoothly.

17. Lubricates noisy door hinges on both home and vehicles doors.

18. It removes that nasty tar and scuff marks from the kitchen

flooring. It doesn't seem to harm the finish and you won't have to

scrub nearly as hard to get them off. Just remember to open some

windows if you have a lot of marks.

19. Remove those nasty bug guts that will eat away the finish

on your car if not removed quickly!

20. Gives a children's playground gym slide a shine for a super fast slide.

21. Lubricates gearshift and mower deck lever for ease of handling on

riding mowers.

22. Rids kids rocking chair and swings of squeaky noises.

23. Lubricates tracks in sticking home windows and makes them easier to open.

24. Spraying an umbrella stem makes it easier to open and close.

25. Restores and cleans padded leather dashboards in vehicles, as well

as vinyl bumpers.

26. Restores and cleans roof racks on vehicles.

27. Lubricates and stops squeaks in electric fans.

28. Lubricates wheel sprockets on tricycles, wagons and bicycles for

easy handling.

29. Lubricates fan belts on washers and dryers and keeps them running smoothly.

30. Keeps rust from forming on saws and saw blades, and other tools.

31. Removes grease splatters from stove-tops.

32. Keeps bathroom mirror from fogging.

33. Lubricates prosthetic limbs.

34. Keeps pigeons off the balcony (they hate the smell).

35. Removes all traces of duct tape.

36. Folks even spray it on their arms, hands, and knees to relieve

arthritis pain.

37. Florida 's favourite use is: 'cleans and removes love bugs from

grills and bumpers.'

38. The favourite use in the state of New York , it protects the Statue

of Liberty from the elements.

39. WD-40 attracts fish. Spray a little on live bait or lures and you

will be catching the big one in no time. Also, it's a lot cheaper than

the chemical attractants that are made for just that purpose. Keep

in mind though, using some chemical laced baits or lures for fishing

are not allowed in some states.

40. Use it for fire ant bites. It takes the sting away immediately and

stops the itch.

41. It is great for removing crayon from walls. Spray it on the marks

and wipe with a clean rag.

42. Also, if you've discovered that your teenage daughter has washed

and dried a tube of lipstick with a load of laundry, saturate the

lipstick spots with WD-40 and rewash. Presto! The lipstick is gone!

43. If you spray it inside a wet distributor cap, it will displace the

moisture, allowing the engine to start.

My discovery, Ants don't like it..................

P.S.

As for that Basic, Main Ingredient.......

Well.... it's FISH OIL....

Now This Is Definitely Worth SHARING!!

[littledreamling]

∇ - old age/aging headcanon (for dream and hob if they were human rather than immortal, i suppose)

Oh my friend, you have just unlocked a side of my mind that's rarely seen but so so feral!

From this headcanon meme!

I absolutely adore aging Hob and Dream. Even outside of a human au, I love the thought of them growing old together. Age continues to exist, even if the physical evidence of it (and indeed, the end result of it) does not. Hob still ages; each year that passes is another year since he last saw his mother, another year since he last rode a horse (he really wants to get back into that and keeps telling himself that this year will be the year, but it never is), another year since he heard his oldest friends' laughter. He feels the weight of his immortality every single day, and it's not an unbearable weight, but it hangs off of his shoulders nonetheless. Dream, too, ages. Perhaps not in the same way; his life is not measured in the same way as human lives are, he does not count each passing second as an added second to his never-ending, eternal clock, nor does he measure the length of the road behind him (or the road ahead of him) in human years. Yet he ages. If learning and growing and changing are all marks of growing up and growing old, then he is doing both. He was not always; for a long time, he had been stuck in time, neither adapting nor maturing in any conceivable way, but recent events (and a certain immortal mortal) have dragged him firmly into the realm of the aging.

And it's a good thing! Hob had learned the old aphorism long ago: change or die, and he had chosen to live. Living means changing; changing with the times, changing outlooks, changing opinions, changing biases. He is a master of change, moving from one life to the next with all the fluidity of a rushing river. His ability to do so is his aging. Likewise, Dream's willingness to, if nothing else, at least see Hob's point of view about change, shows his own aging.

But you didn't send this ask to hear me wax poetic about the philosophy of aging or changing, so here are my thoughts on old, human Dreamling.

Dream is a grumpy old man. He's the old man who worked every day of his life, without break or vacation, and his body is punishing him for it. He was definitely an artist of some kind, maybe a sculptor, maybe something else. It doesn't matter; at the end of his day, his knees click and his knuckles are swollen with arthritis and all of the muscles that had built up in his shoulders have languished in his old age. He can't hold a paintbrush or spin a pottery wheel anymore and it eats him alive with every sunrise. Hob, on the other hand, is the singular spot of warmth and light in Dream's life. Hob, a retired soldier, or maybe a life-long construction worker, has kept his sunny disposition (and, infuriatingly, his fit frame) into his older years. They're the quintessential grumpy one/sunshine one, though anyone who knows them personally knows that Dream has a soft spot for children, and for birds, and for anyone who has a story to tell, while Hob has a mean streak a mile wide if you get on his bad side. They spend their days sitting at the kitchen table, cradling warm cups of coffee or tea, or sitting on their front porch, cradling warm cups of coffee or tea, or sitting on a bench in their local park, cradling warm cups of coffee or tea. They always have warm cups of coffee or tea. They're well-known at the coffee shop, and Hob will recount the story of how they met in that very same shop loudly and at length to anyone who asks (and sometimes to people who don't).

On days when Dream feels as though he can't get out of bed, like his body is too heavy for the world, like his mind has fallen into such disrepair as to be unusable, Hob is the one who sits next to him, a warm hand on his shoulder, and affectionately calls him a drama queen. He'll roll his eyes at his husband's antics, but he'll bring him breakfast in bed anyway. And when Hob is haunted by old nightmares of a long life, not always well-lived, Dream will hold one of their countless books in long, shaking fingers, and he will read to his husband, poems and epic tales, and Dream won't tell Hob that he's not reading, he's reciting, because his quiver and eyesight have gotten so bad that he can't see the words clearly, but he knows them in his heart. And Hob won't tell Dream that he doesn't need to go through the trouble, that it's his presence that's grounding, not the words he's speaking; he'll sit in his presence and let the wash of words roll over him like a comforting tide, drowning his bone-deep anxieties. He'd listen to his husband read the phone book and still find enjoyment in that deep voice and the cadence of his tone.

And when they die, because they do die, they die together. Not in time, mind you, but in company. Surrounded by friends and family, the younger siblings of the Endless family, the children they adopted and the grandchildren, both blood-related and not. Morpheus dies first, his body breaking at the seams. He dies in his sleep, napping on the couch while Hob cooks dinner, and his last words are breathed into the quiet room, asking Hob for a blanket. The funeral is a somber affair, a solemn celebration of everything Morpheus had been; an artist, a husband, a father, a flawed man. The entire town attends, even those who had gotten yelled at from across the lawn or across the park (Dream had taken grave offense to anyone disrupting the local bird population, a story that gets told at the reception with teary eyes and wobbly smiles). When Hob gets home, their entire family is there, warm and laughing and joyful and he can feel his husband in the room, in the people they both had dedicated their lives to.

When Hob dies a week later, no one is surprised. It's his daughter who finds him, curled up on the very same couch, wrapped in the very same blanket, tucked lovingly around him, as if someone else had draped the quilt over his shoulders. She cries, because he was her father, and she loved him, and a part of her had hoped that he would be around forever. But there is a larger part, a much larger part, that finds comfort in the sight. Hob and Dream were never meant to be separated. Wherever they are, she reasons (because they were never a religious family), they are together. For now and forever. As they always should be.

[pinehutch]

In 2018 I fell down some stairs and severely sprained my right ankle and moderately sprained the left one. Didn't rest long enough . Physio. Recovery took a long time and only ever got me back to maybe 80%? I walked less.

Eleven months later, in 2019, I fell down the same stairs (I was going out to buy some shoes with more ankle support obviously) and severely sprained my left ankle and moderately sprained the right one. More physio, eventually. But I walked less.

Nine months later it was March 2020 and we were in first lockdown for ages. I didn't leave my town at all until the next October. I was afraid of crossing paths with people in parks. My immunocompromised (RA) ass hardly went into the office at all for the better part of three years. I walked less.

Last February, I started a sick leave because my mental health was the worst it's ever been in my life. I spent days and days crying. I had to trick myself into eating with prepared foods and snacks. I slept not at all or, after a change in meds, for 16+ hours per day. Needless to say, I walked very little indeed. I started a gradual return to work in June, half days from home.

Last August, I had a super enormous arthritis flare and my knees, especially the left one but actually both of them, were fucked. I couldn't walk without a crutch or cane for several months, and when I say "walk" I mean "even for just a few feet." I walked less.

I've been diligent with physio this time and I can walk for about five minutes without a cane. But the factors that made me extra sedentary all fall and winter, combined with a desk job, mean that my legs and hip muscles are all fucked up. The piriformis is my enemy. I just got a Charley horse so bad that I yelled; I was lying in bed on my stomach, gently flexing my legs at the knee. This is after massage therapy this afternoon and a muscle relaxer before bed.

So anyway it's actually kind of horrifying to watch yourself become progressively more disabled from the feet up over such a long period of time that you forget what it was like before that. It's worrisome that first ankles then knees and now hips and nothing has recovered all the way.

And the weirdest part is that I'm generally feeling better than I have in well over a year. Which means, I think, that 2024 is the year of. pine's incredibly gradual training montage.

[twistedblackdragon]

Dream Bike, 2018 Indian Chieftain Dark Horse and probably last Bike. I'll be 60 in May and I have extremely evil, degenerative inflammatory Osthio arthritis, and I need a knee replacement from getting hit by a drunk driver, when I was on a 750, 32 years ago. Hips and lower spine, messed up from riding mowers, walk behinds and weed eaters, for 30 years.. Probably talking to social security next year. Bright Blessings and Safe Roads.

TBD. 10/25/2023.

[biggothbelly]

"You must be looking at this content because you secretly like it" I've sent anon asks to many people struggling with ED's over the years because I used to struggle myself. I do wish someone would've reached out to me all those years ago but everyone was affirming which made it harder to understand something was wrong. I browse the pro ana tags sometimes too because I've dealt with both ED's at different times in life, I like knowing that there's a small chance I could be that person I needed for someone else.

I've seen how morbid obesity wrecks mental health and physical, a couple people in my family and a close friend have all had early onset arthritis before 30, and one had a knee replacement which inhibits how she can move & She's only 27. You could potentially develop diabetes, lose a limb from infection, develop edema, sleep apnea, hypertension, heart issues, increased risk of dementia, etc.

It's very similar to the mindset of someone with anorexia in the way that people are often in total denial, they claim that it's not a danger to their health because they're still alive. Also they use hell sites like this to feel validated (i.e it's ok because other people do it too or it makes me happy) It gives you a sense of community but in reality it's an echo chamber of disordered people pushing eachother down + predatory users looking for fetish content. I wish you the best. Just consider your health first.

All I hear is a lot of yappin’. Good for you you’re such a hero!! Would you like a cookie? You don’t know me so honestly I really don’t give a shit. I’m glad you’re such an angel. Chill the hell out. Quit stalking me and get a life. It’s hilarious how you think every fat person is the same lol. Physically and mentally I’m good. Consider these nuts 🥜 brother I really don’t give a fuck get off your yappin ass high horse

[gerinurse]

A weird thing happened…..

Those of you who have been here with me for a long time know that due to dual autoimmune disorders, I live with chronic, deep seated joint and muscle pain. It is so bad that some days, it simply hurts to stand or move at all, but a weird thing happened overnight. I got up at 8am for the day and had no pain in my hips and knees which are usually the worst. I’m talking zero pain at all when I haven’t had zero pain in 18yrs. I just don’t understand it. I did nothing abnormal yesterday, haven’t changed my diet or meds. So why has this happened? Polymyalgia Rheumatica is an inflammatory arthritis so it’s affected by food etc. and fibromyalgia had periods of exacerbation but it’s remission type periods are never totally pain free. I don’t want to look a gift horse in the mouth but I’d love to know what’s caused this miracle so I can stay pain free for more than a day.

[arosebyanyothername2016]

Disneyland, Disney World adds Dolls in Wheelchairs to “its a small world after all” attraction.

Disneyland, Disney World adds Dolls in wheelchairs to “it’s a small world after all attraction. Get off your high horse and out of your comfort zone on this chill in the air, no malaise Sunday. So your knee jerks and you have a touch of arthritis-flip it and listen up. They had no more raisin bran muffins left at our local deli so we went to corn, Plan B. The restaurant only had a 6:00 or…

[horsentale]

Love Horse N Tale Products

I love the Horse N Tale Products I am very thankful for them!

CUSTOMER REVIEW I love the Horse N Tale Products I am very thankful for them! We love hearing from our customers or potential customers. Especially seeing pictures of you and your equine athletes with our products and how they have helped treated many conditions and ailments.  Below is a customer video testimonial. CUSTOMERS LOVE HORSE N TALE PRODUCTS Horses and their owners love our all…

[smol-dargon]

I've been working on a few things here and there, including "ask me anything" lists for my characters. It's been rough over here, and none of that is finished. So instead, here is an "ask me anything" list about yours truly!

How many scars do you have? Where are they located? How did you get them? What do they look like?

I've got bunches of small ones from cat scratches and hay bales over the years, all over my arms, just tiny scratches. I also have a few pockmark scars from having chicken pox at age 2. That's basically it, I've never sustained any sort of major injury.

How many hours a night do you sleep? Do you nap? How restful is your sleep? Do you have nightmares?

I typically get 6 to 8 hours a night, and I usually feel ok when I wake up. I have nightmares sometimes. Most of them are just waking up with vague feelings of dread, but sometimes I get surprised with a really vivid one. Hours of fun, those ones.

How many meals a day do you eat? What does a typical meal look like?

Usually just two and a snack. I have buttered bread or toast in the mornings, I'll either meal prep pasta or rice for lunch or go out for something quick and easy, and I'll have a big dinner. I don't usually include meat with lunch, just because it's more expensive. Plus, I can add vegetables in. I tend not to eat them otherwise.

Do you have a consistent routine? Do you find it hard to stick to a routine?

On the one hand, I like routine and I like to know what to expect from my day. On the other hand, aside from work, I don't typically do the same things all the time. I vacillate between hobbies and I really don't get out much.

Do you have chronic health conditions? How does this affect you day-to-day?

I have autism, CPTSD, and arthritis. I tend to overthink social interactions despite no longer feeling hypervigilant, I mask anything that comes across as potentially odd, and I have a persistent limp on my right side, probably in the knee, but maybe the hip? They both hurt, all my joints hurt. I'm used to it, along with the chronic fatigue.

How often do you visit the doctor?

I don't even have a primary care physician. If I'm seeing a doctor, it's solely because I'm concerned I might legitimately be dying. All they've ever done is minimize and deflect, and I'm not interested in that. I'll cautiously self-diagnose, seeking input from many reputable sources, rather than trust some dude with a diploma.

What do you do to relax? Is it easy to carve out time for relaxation?

Relaxation is a relative term. I carry tension in my body at all times, even when I'm sleeping or apparently lounging. My mind never stops working, and it can be exhausting. But I do direct my mind to nicer things whenever possible. I enjoy crocheting and writing, as well as listening to music. I've been on a video game OST kick for years now, and it shows no signs of stopping.

Do you handle stress well? What is a surefire sign for others to know you're stressed? How does stress affect you physically and mentally?

That's my secret, Cap; I'm always stressed. I wear it well, and it doesn't cause me many problems I'm not already capable of handling. Sudden stress from work or adverse life events, I tend to panic for a little while and then come to the understanding that none of it realistically matters. I've always found a way through and it's not like I could just kill myself. I'm too busy to die. Besides, my friends would miss me, and that's one thing I'm great at--making friends happy. I hide stress fairly well, but if I've become reclusive, drink more, and don't engage in anything more than doomscrolling, I'm probably worried about something.

How tall are you?

I am exactly five feet tall. Funnily enough, this is equal to 15 hands in horse height.

Are you a virgin?

Don't see why this matters? I am not.

What's your shoe size?

I have no idea. Small.

Do you smoke, drink, or do drugs?

I have historical tendencies to drink, and I have imbibed the ol' Mary Jane once or twice. Beyond that, my biggest vice is actually caffeine.

Do you get mistaken for another age?

All the time. People assume I'm a teenager or in my early twenties. My birth year starts with 19, I'm ancient.

Do you have any tattoos or piercings?

My earlobes are pierced, along with one cartilage piercing each. I have four tattoos. On my spine, Dovahzul runes from Skyrim spelling out "Imaaraan", which translates to "enslaved". Take from that what you will. On my left shoulder, an image of a shrine of Akatosh from Skyrim. On my right forearm, a quote in Daedric: "I am alive because that one is dead/I exist because I have the will to do so". On my left forearm, a dragon coiled around a d20 with the 20 facing up. All in black ink; color doesn't look good on me. I have plans for more, but money.

Who's your best friend?

I don't assign "best". I have a partner, a small circle of friends, a slightly larger circle of acquaintances, and everyone else.

What is your relationship status?

I have been happily committed to my partner for the last ten years. We don't intend to marry, simply because it sounds like a hassle. We are content, and have three cats together.

What are your biggest turnons and turnoffs?

Eheheh… Wow, intrusive, aren't we? Theoretically I'm into bondage/shibari, power play, sensory deprivation, and hypnotism. In reality? I'm basically ace. Turnoffs are the obvious; scat, vomit, piss, that sort of thing. I've had enough of that in my working life, no sense bringing it into the bedroom.

What's your favorite movie?

Again with the absolutes… I have a few I really like. Namely, Robots, Shrek and Shrek 2, Home Alone, Chicken Little, Fiddler on the Roof, Pokemon the First Movie… there's a few others, but those are what come to mind.

What would make you say "I'll love you if…"?

This question gives me the ick. Be a good person and I'll like you, or at least tolerate you. Conditional love is so last century.

Who is someone you miss?

I couldn't possibly mourn everyone I've lost in a single paragraph… I miss my grandparents, lost in childhood to cancer and heart failure. I miss everyone who was ever kind to me in middle school. I especially miss my best friend Kalayna from elementary school. I hope she's doing well, and if she happens to be reading this, I hope you know I still have the pokemon cards you gave me, and the Vileplume you traded to my copy of LeafGreen. I hope life is treating you well; you deserve the best.

What was your most traumatic experience?

… Just go read the Cracking Up chapters from Finding a Better Life Coach, it's all there.

What do you love most about yourself? What do you hate most about yourself?

I guess… I appreciate my commitment to fact and truth. And my bullheaded determination to keep living, even when things are looking bad. I hate quite a bit about myself, but nothing as much as my decisions from the past. I made a great many mistakes in my life, and even if they're not unique or abjectly horrible, I still regret them deeply.

What is your eventual life or career goal?

As long as I'm making enough money to pay my bills and I'm generally being treated well, I am satisfied.

What's your relationship with your siblings and parents like?

I've never met my dad, but my mom's current husband is a decent guy. Kind of a lovable asshole. I don't speak much with my mom. She's very narcissistic and refuses to take responsibility for her actions. She once introduced me to extended family as "her r*tarded child", what does that tell you? My sister and I don't speak much. My brother and I occasionally play World of Warcraft together. I'd be much happier without any ties to the lot of them, if we're being honest. But it's convenient for the moment. Sounds bad, but given my history, I feel justified in my feelings.

What's your idea of the perfect date?

I never really got the idea of romance. Just order a pizza and put a movie on, no sense going broke over someone.

What are your biggest pet peeves?

Tailgaters. I will slow down to 20mph and not bat an eye at it, get the hell off my ass. Beyond that? People not listening when I say something or outright ignoring my advice. I'm not an idiot, and I don't make decisions based on nothing.

Who is someone you dislike the most?

I feel I've covered this one adequately already.

What's a reason you've lied to a friend?

Anytime I felt misunderstood or unwanted, I have lied. I lie all the time. "I'm fine", is my most common lie.

What do you hate most about your job?

Currently? Management. Internal politics. I'll not say more, I think it falls under NDA.

What are some words that upset you the most? And some that make you feel the best?

Abandoned always stings. I'm not fond of r*tard either, for obvious reasons. I like hearing that people are proud of me or like something I've suggested. I like hearing that I'm useful, and wanted. Loved? Not as important as being needed.

What do you find attractive in others?

Look, I've got a type, and literally nobody alive fits the description. You're most attractive if you're non-human, tall, lanky, and "Don't Get It" (trademark).

Where would you like to live?

If money weren't an object? Somewhere in the deep south with no neighbors for a hundred miles. Forest preferred. Give me a homestead, a couple horses, cows, some chickens, and the ability to grow and preserve my own food. Leave me the hell alone. Society sucks.

What is one insecurity you have?

Just one? Hard choice… I think my singing voice is terrible. It's neither masculine nor feminine, and sometimes I wish it would just pick one.

What's your favorite flavor of ice cream?

Basic flavors? Chocolate. I like cookies and crème too, and anything with chocolate chunks, brownies, cookie bits, caramel… Anything but nuts and mint. Nuts are Bad Texture and if I wanted mint, I'd brush my teeth.

Where do you want to be right now?

(Draws one of my fictional novels from out of a hat)

What's the last thing you ate?

Beef pizza.

Who's the sexiest celebrity that comes to mind immediately?

I don't know, Danny Devito?

Do you trust your instincts?

Depends. In video games, writing, and horses? Absolutely. Anywhere else? Absolutely not.

What's an action you regret not taking?

There's so many of them… I guess I regret not spitting on the grave of my mother's first husband when I left the state. But I'm sure I'll get the chance to in the future.

Would you risk yourself to save another?

Despite myself, probably. Being useful is the most important thing I have to offer.

Would you kill to save another?

Probably.

Could you cut ties with someone for the greater good?

I'd cut ties for one corn chip.

Would you survive alone in the wild for a week?

I'm too stubborn to die. I'm also reasonably well-versed in survival. Plenty for a week.

What is your safe place or comfort zone?

Anywhere I can close and lock a door and not be bothered. Aside from a bathroom, that's weird.

If you became immortal, would you consider it a blessing or curse?

Definitely a curse. But at least I could torment humanity with my skeleton fanfics for all eternity.

What's the greatest challenge you've overcome?

Making it to today is always the biggest hurdle. My next goal is to make it to tomorrow.

What's a challenge you could never overcome?

Verbalizing my emotions. But at least I can text them.

Are you an optimist or pessimist?

I am definitely a pessimist. I'm always either right or pleasantly surprised. Not to mention prepared for the worst.

Do you believe in an afterlife?

No. Just the hallucinations of a dying brain.

If you could redo one moment in your childhood, what would it be and how would you change it?

… I would hug my granny a little tighter before I left that weekend.

What are three fears you have?

Spiders, heights, and bubonic plague.

What are three things you like?

That's a pretty broad question. Video games, horses, and music, I guess.

What is your sexual orientation?

I think I'm classified as pansexual or androsexual. I'm nonbinary and I prefer to date masculine-presenting individuals.

What does the best first date look like?

I mean, I guess dinner and a movie?

What is your favorite color?

Black. But red, orange, and blue are close seconds.

What is your favorite place?

Aside from my house? I guess my car.

What is your favorite food?

I'll eat anything. I guess crawfish are pretty high up there.

Do you use sarcasm?

Surprisingly, I'm great at sarcasm. People just assume I'm not because I'm autistic. They assume I'm taking it seriously when I'm actually continuing to play on their sarcasm.

What's the first thing you notice when meeting new people?

Their vibe. Do they feel dangerous?

What is your favorite style of clothing?

Sweatpants and t-shirts. Loose and comfy.

Have you ever done a prank call?

No, but I've pocket-dialed a bunch of people, including 911.

What is your favorite song or genre of music?

Currently, my earworm is Badly Decomposed Brain from the MediEvil 2019 OST. I like orchestral music including video game remixes, and rock.

What's your favorite holiday?

Thanksgiving. I like making sure my friends and family leave my house fat and happy.

What is your relationship with your last ex?

I hope he gets buried alive, force-fed honey, and left to be eaten alive by the insects attracted to his shit.

When was the last time you held someone's hand?

Hm, it's been a minute. But I do cuddle my partner frequently.

How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

Normally? Fifteen minutes. In a hurry? Five or less and I'm out the door.

If you were drunk and couldn't stand, who would be taking care of you?

Realistically, my partner. But I'd manage myself alone either way.

Do you like music loud or soft?

Loud. How else am I supposed to appreciate the french horns going ham on the harmony under the main theme?

Are you excited for anything coming up?

Not really. I very much live day-to-day. I get excited for dinner.

How often do you wear a fake smile?

Only when interacting professionally. Otherwise, you get what you deserve.

When was the last time you hugged someone?

I always hug my partner every chance I get. You never know when it will be the last time.

Is there anyone you trust that you really shouldn't?

I don't trust anyone.

What is your strangest talent?

I can tell you the location and criteria for obtaining every unique weapon and piece of armor in Skyrim; excluding Creation Club content, I'm still exploring that.

What is your strangest phobia?

All of my phobias are sensible. But I suppose it's odd for a former vet tech to be afraid of needles.

What's the last lie you told?

"I'm fine."

Do you prefer talk or text?

Text. Less pressure to respond, ignores the potential of me being muted.

Do you believe in ghosts or aliens?

Neither. I only believe what can be proven.

Do you believe in magic?

Despite how prominently it features in my fics, I do not. I can dream, though…

Do you believe in luck?

No.

What's the last book you read?

Hm, the last one I read cover to cover was Unmentionable, which is about sex, contraception, hygiene, and similar topics in Victorian England.

Do you have a nickname?

I've had several over the years, but these days I just go by Nyx.

What's the worst injury you've ever had?

Aside from what caused my CPTSD? I once had a kidney stone? I got my arms shredded by a small dog once while placing a cone of shame on him?

Do you spend or save?

I try very much to save, but I typically give myself an allowance to have for fun.

Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

Yes, barely at the septum.

What's your favorite animal?

(Looks at the camera like in The Office)

What were you doing last night at midnight?

Sleeping.

What is Satan's last name?

Darmstaedter. No relation to me, I assure you.

What's a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

On Top of the World by Imagine Dragons, and I don't care that its cheesy.

How does one win your heart?

Patiently. You must establish yourself as truthful and respectful, and you must be quick to acknowledge and fix mistakes. I tend not to forgive, and I certainly do not forget. Once a rift appears in the relationship, it's too late. I've already abandoned ship.

Do you have a preferred eulogy or tombstone engraving?

Hm, I've never thought about it… I fully intend on donating my body to science and having it tossed into the wilderness afterwards. Don't visit me at a gravesite, I'm not there. Visit me while I'm alive, that's when it matters.

What's your favorite word?

Sternocleidomastoid. I also like promiscuous and pernicious.

Do you have any relatives in jail?

Probably, no idea.

What's a question you'd be afraid to answer truthfully?

Are you afraid?

Have you ever been pregnant?

No, thank god.

Have you ever failed a class?

I failed the first semester of organic chemistry. But I retook it and passed with a high grade the next year. I did come perilously close to failing both semesters of physics though.

Have you ever kissed anyone?

Why is this question after the virgin question? That makes no sense. Of course I have.

Have you ever kissed anyone in the rain?

That sounds unpleasant.

Have you ever left home without your wallet?

Once or twice. I keep my wallet in a set location now so I don't forget.

Have you ever bullied someone on the internet?

Oh yeah. I love going after homophobes and bigots. They never listen, but all I have to do is block them and the conversation is over. Easy to win.

Have you ever had public sex?

Absolutely not. Exhibitionism is not for me.

Are you vegetarian or vegan?

You can pry steak from my cold, dead hands.

Have you ever been underweight or overweight?

I used to think I was fat, but it turns out this is my correct shape. I'd been living on a cortisol high, and it was causing me to burn excess calories, which led me to actually be a bit too skinny. It's amazing how your body can change once you start feeling safe.

Have you ever been to a wedding?

Only a couple. I'm not a fan.

Have you ever watched TV for 5 straight hours?

Those are rookie numbers. I've watched for 16 while crocheting something.

Have you ever broken a bone?

Nope.

Have you ever been on an airplane?

I love flying. I've been on several planes and I always enjoy worrying about turbulence and thinking about all the other planes of the same model that have crashed.

Do you know any other languages?

Regrettably, I'm only fluent in English. I am trying to learn Spanish, though.

Have you ever dyed your hair?

Once, red with a box dye. Didn't notice a difference and didn't feel like spending the money to do anything more extreme.

Have you ever rode in an ambulance?

No, but I have kept up with one driving across town with my papaw inside.

Have you ever had surgery?

No, and the idea scares me.

Have you ever peed outside?

The law of the trail: everyone else averts their gaze, you hide behind your horse, being careful to give distance if you're riding a gelding who sympathy pees. And always check to ensure you're not pissing on a snake. That tends to piss them off.

Have you ever been fishing?

A couple times. Once with family for small brim, another with an ex. I'm pretty sure he just wanted to make out.

Have you ever broken a mirror?

Probably, but I can't recall for certain.

What do you want for your birthday?

To win the lottery…

Are you a righty or a lefty?

I am technically cross-dominant. I have a handedness, but which hand depends on the task. I write left handed, snap right handed, and at one time could place IV catheters with either hand.

Do you have any pets?

We have three cats. Mr. T is a 13yr old domestic shorthair, a smoky grey tabby. Bean is a 7yr old domestic longhair, all white except with some black ears and tail. And Stitch is a 19yr old domestic shorthair, more brown in color and tabby.

What's your favorite piece of clothing you own?

A t-shirt my partner's mom got me. It's purple and says do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for thou art crunchy and go good with ketchup.

Do you play any instruments?

I used to play piano, saxophone, and bassoon, but I am sorely out of practice.

Do you like chewing gum?

No, makes my teeth feel weird.

Do you prefer coffee, tea, or hot chocolate?

I only drink one specific coffee: the iced coca mocha latte from Dunkin' Donuts. Otherwise, hot chocolate.

White, milk, or dark chocolate?

Dark is my favorite, but I like milk too.

What's your favorite type of cake?

Anything chocolate is a good bet, as long as there's no nuts. I love red velvet too.

How long can you hold your breath?

I've never timed it, but I was a band kid. I've got the breath control to belt out a whole stanza of certain songs.

What is your favorite physical feature about yourself?

Probably my hair. I've grown to love the color and thickness. I haven't cut it beyond trimming dead ends since 2014.

Can you drive?

Yes, but I take after my mother. It's only illegal if you get caught.

Can you bike?

Yes, but I'm not very graceful at it.

Can you swim?

Not even a little.

What's the furthest you've ever traveled from home?

I drove seventeen hours to move here to North Carolina. All in one day, only stopped for gas, had my vehicle stuff floor to ceiling with my things, my bike mounted to the back, and my two cats in the front seat.

Are you scared of space?

You'd have to be an idiot not to be.

Can you knit?

I know how to, but I'm not very good at it. I prefer crochet, I'm great at that.

What's scarier, the ocean or space?

Space. At least the things in the ocean belong here.

Have you ever played competitive sports?

No, I don't like the pressure to perform.

What's a sport you've never played but want to try?

Skijoring looks fun. I want to try both the riding and the boarding.

What's your favorite Christmas movie?

Home Alone, but Nightmare Before Christmas is right there with it.

How many spoons can you balance on your face?

Yeah, I'm not doing that one.

Does pineapple belong on pizza?

Sure, depends on the rest of the toppings though.

What's your ideal temperature?

80F. I hate being cold.

How tidy is your room?

Everything has a place, but I really need to dust.

Have you ever tried a dating app?

They didn't have those when I met my partner, and I've not had a reason to use them.

Do you drink coffee or energy drinks?

I drink soda, does that count?

Are you good at math?

Not even a little.

How many phone numbers do you have memorized?

Three. Mine, my mom's (because it's only 4 digits off), and my childhood home's number.

Can you do a handstand?

Not for very long, even with a supporting wall. Hurts my neck.

What's your favorite type of jewelry?

I don't wear much. Rings, I guess.

Savory or sweet?

Savory, for sure. But Sweet and Savory is good too.

What do you call carbonated beverages?

Soda, or whatever their brand is.

Can you fit your fist in your mouth?

I think we're done here.

[natural-mobility1]

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[trkmedicalproducts]

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[elissabaratheon]

We are pleased to announce the arrival of { PRINCESS ELISSA BARATHEON } of {STORM’S END} to King’s Landing! The { 48 } year-old { FEMALE } is whispered to be { CONTROLLING & OPPORTUNISTIC } but in reality they are { DEVOTED & LEADERLY }. They are also said to resemble {RACHEL WEISZ}. They are { FOR } a new treaty of peace and unity between House Targaryen and House Stark. Things, however, are not always quite what they seem, are they?

written for godsandmonstersrpg by mini (27, she/her/hers, est) pinterest

Demographics

Name: Elissa Baratheon (née Swann) (pronounced:  eh-liss-uh) 

Nickname/Alias: Called Lissy as a little girl, and still called as much by her siblings and husband, though she is loathe to answer to it. 

Age: 48

Place of Birth: Stonehelm 

Sex/Gender: Cisgendered female 

Sexuality: Heterosexual  

Physical Appearance

FC: Rachel Weisz (as she appears in The Favourite)

Eye color: Hazel 

Skin color: White

Hair color and Style: Dark brown, waist length, parted down the middle, curly. 

Height: 162.56 cm/5’4”

Body type: Slender, soft-dramatic kibbe type. 

Fitness level: Limited, though not entirely sedentary. 

Tattoos: N/A

Scars/Birthmarks: Typical stretch-mark scarring attributed to multiple pregnancies.

Notable features: Heart-shaped face, broad and notable cheekbones, narrowed jawline. 

Disabilities: Osteoarthritis (early stages, particularly notable in hands, knees and hips) 

Fashion style: Dresses herself in modern fashions, albeit with more modest cuts. Sports the black and white colors of her born House as often as the black and gold of her marital House.

Accessories: Rarely seen without some adornment of jewelry, particularly necklaces. She has a great collection of rings, but pain in her hands has caused her to largely abandon her wearing of them. 

Cleanliness/Grooming: Regimented to a fault in her own hygiene patterns. She prefers to feel and look clean and well put together. 

Posture/Gait: Healthy posture. Graceful bearing, albeit during flare-ups she can have a slight limp, which she is loathe to have seen by others. 

Coordination (or lack thereof): Well-coordinated. 

Psychological Traits

Personality type: ENTJ-A, The Commander 

Bold, imaginitive, strong-willed, always able to find a way to get what they want — or to make a way if needed. Focus is placed on objectivity and rationality. Effectiveness is preferred over social harmony. Decisive, thorough, and highly organized. 

Personality traits: 

Positive: Disciplined, leaderly, charismatic, methodical, courteous, devoted 

Negative: Calculating, deceitful, arrogant, domineering, opportunistic, possessive

Temperament: Choleric

Characterized as decisive, focused, and goal-oriented. Highly practical, rational, and logical. Excellent strategic planner. However, their high degree of ambition and determination can sometimes be perceived as aggressive or overbearing. May struggle with a strong desire for control. 

Mannerisms: Wringing her hands together. 

Educational background: Provided with the typical education afforded to a highborn girl. Well-read on her own accord, versed in house histories and political strategy. 

Religious background: Raised to worship the Seven. Not a particularly devout believer, but has nonetheless committed to an image of piety. 

Intelligence: Highly shrewd, strong consequential thinking skills. 

Self-esteem: Strong. 

Hobbies: Avid reader, enjoys overseeing the breeding of fine horse and hunting hounds. 

Skills/talents: Excellent at embroidery, however the skill has become increasingly difficult to perform as she’s begun to suffer from arthritis in her hands. 

Favorites: 

Foods and Drinks: Fish, lamb, plums, Arbor Red

People and Animals: Family, pets (see below)

Events: Prefers private family meals, enjoys hosting feasts.

Songs: Brave Danny Flint, The Dance of the Dragons, Jenny’s Song

Morals/Virtues: Loyalty, prudence, diligence. 

Phobias/Fears: Her body failing her, her children predeceasing her. 

Angered by: Disobedience, disrespect, carelessness. 

Habits: Rewriting letters before sending them, rising in the early morning, tapping her fingers when impatient. Frequent use of dreamwine due to difficulties sleeping. 

Desires: Successful, politically astute marriages for all of her children. She does have hopes and desires for their happiness, but believes that happiness is predicated on a secure future. The advancement of House Baratheon’s interests. The potential reclaiming of Dragonstone for House Baratheon. 

Flaws: Places rigorous, high expectations onto her children. Struggles to concede to another’s opinion or point of view. 

Secrets: TBD

Regrets: TBD

Communication

Languages known: Common Tongue, High Valyrian. She rarely, if ever, speaks the latter — her accent is poor and she does not like to demonstrate this fact. Her knowledge of the language was driven only by her insistence that her husband and children would not speak a language unknown to her. 

Accent: Stormlander  

Style and pacing of speech: Modulated, tight and matter-of-fact at times. 

Pitch: Measured, even, rarely described as loud. 

Laughter: Quiet, polite, more a smile and movement of shoulders than a true laugh.

Smile: Close-mouthed, pretty, ladylike. 

Use of gestures: N/A

Strengths, Weaknesses, and Abilities

Physical strengths: Relatively healthy, but not particularly strong. 

Physical weaknesses: Soreness and weakness from recurrent joint pain. 

Intellectual strengths: Strong organizational skills, excellent memory and capacity to learn.

Intellectual weaknesses: Struggles to integrate divergent opinions when she has set her mind onto something. 

Interpersonal strengths: Highly observant, politically savvy and charismatic. 

Interpersonal weaknesses: Places high expectations of success upon her children, whom she in part views as extensions of herself. 

Physical abilities: Slightly below average. 

Magical abilities: N/A

Physical illnesses/conditions: Suffering from the beginnings of arthritis. This is most notable in pain/tenderness in her hands, and pain/stiffness in her hips and knees. Infertility following the traumatic birth of a sixth child, who was stillborn. Early stage menopause. 

Mental illnesses/conditions: Struggles with recurrent insomnia. Has a difficult time controlling her thinking.

Relationships

Parents: The late ruling Lord Donnel Swann and Lady Jocelyn Swann

Not unlike many of his Stormlander brethren, Donnel Swann endured the challenges of changing loyalties during the War of the Five Kings. First sworn to Renly Baratheon, his allegiance shifted to Stannis in the wake of the younger Baratheon’s demise, and shifted once more to Joffrey under the duress of Lannister control. He pledged his banners once more to the Targaryen Queen and her Baratheon consort, and was intent thereafter to wipe away any stain of indecision from his family’s name. Donnel lent himself as a leal servant of the crown, and for a time left his brother Balon to mind Stonehelm while he served as castellan at Storm’s End. 

Jocelyn Swann, born to House Buckler, proved a steadfast and loyal wife keen to see her husband’s name risen to some honor and acclaim. She was not a particularly affectionate woman to her children, and had little empathy for childhood timidity displayed by Elissa. It was at Jocelyn’s behest that Elissa married not long after she had reached her majority. Elissa considers herself to be a great deal warmer than Jocelyn had been. 

Siblings: The current ruling Lord Swann, additional siblings of House Swann (see wanted connections)

The siblings retain close relationships in adulthood, and Elissa continues to ensure the Swann name is regarded with respect. 

Children: Cassandra, Jasper, Roelle, Orryn, and Matthos Baratheon (individual connections to be expanded upon), along with an unnammed daughter who died shortly following her birth.

Motherhood was the beginning of Elissa finding her footing and power within her role as Lady of Storm’s End. She considers herself to be a devoted mother, though might be regarded as overbearing. She closely involved herself in the rearing and education of her children. While she can offer them praise and pride, she can just as easily offer criticism and judgment. Still, she has a deep and enduring love for each of her children, and all that she does she believes she does for their betterment. Elissa generally did not enjoy pregnancy, and struggled in particular with the successive births of Jasper, Roelle, and Orryn. She believes her children have been spoiled to enjoy a “long youth” as compared to her own upbringing.

Her sixth pregnancy, carried two years after the birth of Matthos, ended in a traumatic preterm delivery (at about the 28 week mark). Elissa suffered a puerperal fever following the delivery that took several weeks of treatment and bedrest to properly recover from. Likely uterine damage was sustained in this delivery, as Elissa struggled with infertility onward. 

Nieces & Nephews: Daeron, Rhae, and Visenya Targaryen through marriage. Daenys Targaryen through marriage. 

Extended family: Rhaenys Baratheon née Velaryon, TBD 

Pets: Buckskin female destrier called Tempest (about 20 years old), white female alaunt called Elenei (about 9 years old)

Both her horse and dog were at times prized breeding specimens, but have since been retired by Elissa. She does not often ride Tempest, but keeps her well-exercised and in superior stables. Her dog is often closeby and is highly obedient, if mistrusting of others. 

Partner(s)/Significant other(s): Prince [TBD] Baratheon, her husband (see wanted connections).

Specifics of relationship dynamic are TBD. 

Friends: Companion/confidante, see wanted connections.

Longtime companion, informal spymaster, most trusted friend. 

Rivals: House Targaryen of King’s Landing & Dragonstone  

Enemies: TBD

Significant Background Events

Her father’s appointment as castellan of Storm’s End occurred when Elissa was still fairly young, and the family relocated to the Baratheon stronghold while he took up this role. Elissa arrived at the castle as a timid girl, albeit intelligent and studious. Her mother set her aspirations on Elissa marrying the young son of Daenerys and Gendry swiftly, and those expectations landed heavily on Elissa’s slight shoulders. She was taught to pursue the same interests and hobbies of the young Prince, and given unyielding expectations of success in developing courtly manner and womanly skills.

As Elissa came into her adolescence, she began to chafe under the demands of her mother. Though she would obey the expectations put onto her, she began to yearn for a personal sense of control and power. She did not wish to be a frightened waif, but instead a sharp-witted woman who had some handle on her own destiny within the confines laid out for her. 

Elissa’s marriage to the Baratheon heir occurred shortly after she reached her majority. She became pregnant fairly quickly into the marriage, and after the birth of Cassandra, Elissa increasingly felt some handle on the direction of her life. 

(To continue to be expanded upon.)

Character Growth

Character comparisons/archetype: Archetypal mentor and political animal. Character comparisons include Lady Macbeth, Olenna Tyrell, Cersei Lannister, Margaret Beaufort, and Agatha Danbury. LM and Olenna stand out for their mentorship roles and ability to work as a power-behind-the-throne. The comparison with Cersei is minimal, but present with regard to some of the projection present in her relationship with her children. She recognizes them as individuals, yet also sees them as extensions of herself and her ability to succeed. Success for them is success for her. Margaret Beaufort and Agatha Danbury stand out as young mothers groomed initially to be small-voiced, penitent, dutiful wives. Margaret’s historical influence and command over her child is relevant, as is Agatha’s journey to becoming a revered leader of society. All that to say, I think she is outwardly far more polite than the majority of these comparisons. She believes that it is important her public image be one of piety, kindness, and charity. She knows how to play the game, and is following the old LM adage — look like the innocent flower, but be the serpent under it.

Core values: Family, respect, power. 

Internal conflicts: Her own physical health, battling her desire to see her children pursue their own happiness versus the futures she wishes to secure for them. 

External conflicts: Navigating her children disobeying her wishes, exploring avenues to build and contain power for House Baratheon. 

Goals: Political advancement and success for House Baratheon.

Wanted connections: 

[ ELISSA BARATHEON ] our [RACHEL WEISZ] fc is looking for their [ BROTHER /  LORD OF STONEHELM ]. They’re about [ 35+] and look like [  UTP ]. You [ MAY ] contact the mun at [@elissabaratheon ]. I imagine that Elissa has retained a strong relationship with her brother throughout the years, and he may be similarly politically-inclined and therefore an ally to her. Just as she seeks to further the cause of House Baratheon, she similarly holds loyalty to House Swann, and can certainly conspire with her brother to see that his House and lands continue to prosper. She may in turn expect him to assist her in her own political machinations. 

[ ELISSA BARATHEON ] our [RACHEL WEISZ] fc is looking for their [ SIBLINGS ]. They’re about [35+] and look like [  UTP, any gender is fine ]. You [ MAY ] contact the mun at [@elissabaratheon ]. Any additional siblings of House Swann would  be fun to have! I imagine close-knit bonds and political scheming. Elissa will do for her siblings whatever they need done, but she expects them to repay the kindness. The extent of those “debts” may have a bearing on the state of the relationship. 

[ ELISSA BARATHEON ] our [RACHEL WEISZ] fc is looking for their [ NIECE/NEPHEW ]. They’re about [ 20+ ] and look like [  UTP, any gender is fine ]. You [ MAY ] contact the mun at [@elissabaratheon ]. The heir to House Swann, and perhaps a character who was fostered for a time at Storm’s End in their youth. I can imagine Elissa holding a mentorship role for this character, and perhaps lending a hand in orchestrating an advantageous betrothal. It would be interesting to explore how this character interacts with their Baratheon cousins, and if perhaps they are living up to the standards some of Elissa’s own children are falling short of (in her eyes). 

[ ELISSA BARATHEON ] our [RACHEL WEISZ] fc is looking for their [ HUSBAND,  PRINCE AND RULING LORD OF STORM’S END ]. They’re about [ 48-49 ] and look like [  UTP ]. You [ MAY ] contact the mun at [ @elissabaratheon ]. Just reinforcing the already-posted wanted connection for Prince Baratheon. Happy to expand upon a specific relationship dynamic with a prospective partner, I’m open to anything ranging from devotional to adversarial. 

[ ELISSA BARATHEON ] our [RACHEL WEISZ] fc is looking for their [ CONFIDANTE ]. They’re about [35+] and look like [  UTP, any gender is fine ]. You [ MAY ] contact the mun at [ @elissabaratheon ]. A longtime friend and companion. I imagine this highborn character could serve as a lady-in-waiting, a councilor, or a similar role that has afforded them continued closeness. I would love to see this character act as an unofficial “spymaster” of sorts for Elissa — ably managing a network of servants/spies who ferry information throughout King’s Landing.